Greetings form the sandy shores of the Bahamas. One of my favorite bloggers has graciously offered to help me out. I find her blog to be entertaining, informative and insightful and I hope you do too!
Hi all, my name is Angela and I publish two blogs, Lawgirl and Fattie Fatterton. I have been reading Single Serving for some time now and Krissy was kind enough to let me do a guest post while she’s busy saving the world. :D
Last year I started my journey to getting healthy. I’m still on it, but as you know, the hardest part is getting started. To me, it’s the difference between “can’t” and “won’t”.
I’ve talked about this in my classes I teach (I’m a Corporate Trainer when I’m lucky enough to have a job.). Whenever I teach Time Management, I hear people say, I can’t do my job differently – I can’t change this. I then turn around and say, can’t or won’t?
This stops them dead in their tracks. Their mouths drop open, their eyes widen….and they realize that 99% of the time, the truth is, it’s won’t. So the difference is:
1. Can’t – I physically or emotionally or mentally can not do something.
2. Won’t – I physically or emotionally or mentally will not do something.
We all make decisions every day. And the truth is, most of these are won’t decisions disguised by the word can’t. Take, for example, the following dilemma:
I can’t go after that boy I like, because he might reject me and then I’ll be hurt.
No, the truth is, you are physically, emotionally, and mentally capable – you just don’t want to do it enough. The payoff for you doesn’t outweigh the risk.
And why not? Because we are too afraid to be happy. We only see that one scenario – either he will take me or reject me – but we are so afraid of what happens afterward. What if he doesn’t reject you? What if he says, yes, I have the same feelings and I want to be with you? Then you’re hosed!! You’ve only thought far enough ahead as to you asking the question – not necessarily him saying yes.
Every romance movie ends at Happily Ever After. We never see what happens next. We don’t see that this is just the beginning of the compromise, of figuring out what fits together. It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite movies, How to Make an American Quilt.
Young lovers seek perfection.
Old lovers learn the art of sewing shreds together
and of seeing beauty in a multiplicity of patches.
There is no perfection in love. There is no way that you will find someone who has every interest that you do, that will react and think the same way that you do. It’s impossible. And you wouldn’t want that. You would be bored. If you really liked dating you, well, then you would just date you.
It’s the same thing in health, if you think about it.
What if I try and fail?
What if I look silly trying to exercise?
What if it doesn’t work right away and I don’t loser 100 lbs in two days?
There’s an old saying that nine women can’t take one month to have a baby. It takes one woman nine months to grow and give birth to a baby. It can’t be rushed. Nature forces us to be patient.
Be patient with yourself. You will have a learning curve with learning how to eat properly. It will take some time to find the exercise that you absolutely love to do, no matter what kind of day you’re having (for me, it’s now Yoga, which I just discovered).
But never forget, you have to get out of your own way to be successful.
Love and peace, Angela.