Nothing New (well - maybe something...)

I'm dragging today - because my breakfast was something you've all seen before and my snack is super exciting:



Those would be pretzels, purchased from the vending machine in the break room.

Lunch will be far more exciting, I promise!

OH. Something I wanted to talk about. I am a big weight loss show fan. I adore The Biggest Loser - and not just because of my crushes on both Bob and Jillian.

I also watch the show Ruby on the Style Network on weekends.

If you've never seen it, Ruby is this lovable, upbeat Southern woman who used to weigh over 700 lbs. She's now down to under 350 and counting.

There are all sorts of unknowns in her past that are slowly being uncovered which might explain some of her weight issues. She's got an odd, yet unbelievably supportive network of friends. I just find her enthusiasm infectious and she's as charming as all get out.

On a recent episode, she redid her bedroom and got rid of a whole bunch of her fat clothes. I did that too. I cleaned and organzied my entire apartment and have steadily been getting rid of things that are too big for me. No saving "just one pair" of pants that would fit me if I gained weight back. God willing I won't ever have to replace them. My life feels so much lighter now - in every sense of the word - but it's sometimes scary to go there.

I think it is so important to let that part of you go when you start to lose weight. Most of my clothes were still in good condition and I donated them to a thrift shop near me. I get a tax write off and someone else can enjoy them. Win/Win.

It happened to me again this morning. I put on a pair of pants that were enormous. I didn't even realize I had grown out of them.

Granted - I can't get too excited about a size 16 being too big for me. But I wonder when exactly I'm going to get to the point where I know inherently that they won't fit without even trying them on.

I can see that I've gotten smaller - but sometimes it takes a while for my brain to catch up you know?

Being heavier is somewhat...safer. It's easier to hide, easier to make excuses for why things in your life aren't happening. I think that's the biggest thing I've learned all these months. Even though there have not been any significant changes in my life since I've lost weight I'm still SO MUCH happier.

It's like I was smothering the real me in a way. The number one thing that people have told me when they notice I have lost weight is how happy I look. And as I said - I really am.